open post: in a slightly hazy lounge

[peaklordshen]

After a few false starts, Shen Qingqiu has found a proper place to test out Crowley's BL pollen vape pen.

He posts up in one of the lounges, close enough to the bar that anyone leaving there might find him. He's still in his braid and loose robes - no one else had noticeably started dressing gayer¹ when they took the stuff, intentional or not, so neither will he. He also brings snacks,² and the next book in the Blood at Dusk series, Moonless Midnight, in case it takes a while to kick in, or a while for anyone to come along to prove it has, anyway. If no one finds him here he will go looking, but roaming the Mansion's halls newly homosexual feels like a much more risky prospect than just staying put and seeing what happens.

He arrays himself on a couch, feet tucked up under him (although this might not be immediately apparent due to the robes), Crowley's pen tucked behind one ear so he can make more notes now that he has a glimmer of a chance that Binghe will forgive him,³ and takes a drag on the vape.

He coughs. It's smoke, not pollen—the blooms must be dried and then burned, like with tobacco—and has an odd, kind of greenish flavor. Not unpleasant, but not pleasant, either. He expected it to taste of, like. Cherry blossom, or something. Pink rather than green. Shit, maybe he is a little homophobic.

He takes another drag, and lets the smoke out of his mouth slowly this time, watching it curl up to the ceiling.

By the time anyone finds him, he will be staring unblinking at the opposite wall, book open on his lap to the third page of the first chapter.

[Threads with Sagramore and Luo Binghe are NSFW.]

¹ Please explain what you mean by this, Shen Qingqiu. I'll wait.
² Crowley did tell him to.
³ After he confirms that the pollen works. And goes to find Binghe. And kisses him. And— well. Maybe. After. He can raise the book club idea again?

Comments

[wickedwit]

"You don't need as much as you might imagine," Claudius says, casually amused. "But why the need? I thought you were having fun?"

[peaklordshen]

Well, of course Claudius thinks he doesn't need much, he thought Shen Qingqiu was in love with Luo Binghe while he was still straight. Still, he's right, it is rude not to share, and Crowley probably gets more H-points¹ if Shen Qingqiu goes back for more. He grudgingly lets the vape float back over to Claudius so he can take it.

"I am," he says. "But I'm also doing science."

¹ Hell points, obviously. Don't ask him to think too hard about Aziraphale or he'll get lost in how he has to rename these to distinguish them from Heaven points.

[wickedwit]

Claudius palms the the pen out of the air, and wonders how he became this accustomed to cultivation tricks. They're terribly useful, at least. Lan Wangji doesn't employ his nearly as often, though the fire when they were drinking was entertaining. "Well, I'm very interested in science," he says pleasantly¹. "You have to tell me more."

¹ Doing science for fun while indulging in hemp flower actually does sound like Claudius's idea of a good time.

[peaklordshen]

"I don't have to do anything," Shen Qingqiu mutters, out of some remaining belligerence, but he feels too nice to like the feeling take over. "I'm—observing its effects on myself. Seeing how it makes me act with—" he looks Claudius over, gaze flickering over his body and then back to his face. "You know. People."<sup>1

1</sup> For once he's not intentionally being vague. He thinks Claudius will know exactly what this means.

[wickedwit]

Claudius is at great risk of finding Shen Qingqiu sweet. It makes sense -- here's a man who might be some sort of spy, using to putting on an act for people, unable to admit to himself or express his own feelings, and he's turned to an herbal remedy that may relax him. It's the same sort of self-induced alchemy Claudius hoped would work on him, once. Truth be told, Claudius still struggles to know how to act around people when he's not acting.

He laughs. "I must admit, you're fast becoming charming again. Dissolute, as Grantaire likes to call himself." Though Claudius put off the question, he has to ask now, "Do these people include Luo Binghe?"

[peaklordshen]

Ah. Now they come to the heart of things. Of course Claudius is here, taking BL pollen with Shen Qingqiu, but it's really about Luo Binghe. Everything, Shen Qingqiu reflects, even here, is really about Luo Binghe. You can take the protagonist out of the stallion novel, but... wait. Should that be the other way around?

He feels like he should lie about this, obfuscate, but his brain refuses to cooperate, or remember why telling Claudius this won't be good. Is it because it might make him jealous? But, like, wouldn't it be kind of fun to make Claudius jealous? "Yes," he says, and then gets a little lost planning the cattiest next line. Of course, or why, are you jealous? are way too direct. Because he wants me, way too bold, and also makes something in Shen Qingqiu go hot and flustered. Maybe he should've gone with an arch, wouldn't you like to know, but it's too late now.

[wickedwit]

Claudius laughs again -- it's early yet, Claudius doesn't know whether the vapor has had time to make his humors giddy, but perhaps Shen Qingqiu is simply a very funny man. "For whatever it's worth, I think you two will either make the finest of matches, or you'll ruin each other. And ..." He waves his hand, thinking once more of Grantaire. "It may be a pleasant ruin. Don't overthink things."

[peaklordshen]

Shen Qingqiu makes a face, disgruntled. "Ruin—I have no power to ruin Luo Binghe," he protests. Many greater and more OP people than him have tried. Luo Binghe might ruin him, given the Heavenly Pillar, but he's been trying not to think too hard about that. And failing—he'd been thinking about it when Claudius walked in, and he's thinking about it again. He licks his lips unconsciously.

[wickedwit]

"No, I suppose not." Claudius releases another pleasant cloud of vapor, considering. "I do have to ask. You said the blood parasites could cause intense pleasure as well as pain. If Luo Binghe offered to let you imbibe his blood for the purpose, would you? Because that would be courting your own ruin."

[peaklordshen]

Shen Qingqiu goes very red. What a question—is this the kind of thing gay people talk about???? "I—I am at Luo Binghe's mercy, parasites or no," he says, instead of yes.

[wickedwit]

"Oh, he'll like that," Claudius says and laughs, because this is the sort of thing a gossipy bisexual wine uncle talks about. "You'll have to look coyly into his eyes and say that. Perhaps incline your head and bare your neck ... but no, this is for your scientific research. Strictly scientific questions. Have you been recording your observations?"

[peaklordshen]

Shen Qingqiu thinks advice on baring one's neck and looking coyly at people is actually pretty relevant to BL pollen science, but to each their own. He blinks. Has he—he looks down at his notes (his copy of Moonless Midnight), embarrassed. "All I've written is the name of a cute boy," he admits.

[wickedwit]

The gossipy wine uncle in Claudius needs to know. "Who? There are plenty to look at here."

[peaklordshen]

Shen Qingqiu nods. "A new one," he says, "Blond." He flips through pages of Moonless Midnight until he finds it. "Enjolras!"

[wickedwit]

"Enjolras. Excellent taste. I think it's better to give that one a bit of distance, though," Claudius says, incredibly ready to dispense his gossipy wisdom to a young scientist in need. "Not because he isn't compelling. But he has that uneasy distance about him -- you know, like he's just been through something tragic. Which is admittedly the compelling part. There's something about cute boys who look sad."

Claudius didn't need two hits of the vapor. He makes a mental note of that, to compare it to the effects of smoke. It is nice that he and Shen Qingqiu are more or less involved in the same experiment, he thinks. They understand each other much better this way.

[peaklordshen]

Shen Qingqiu nods. There is something about a cute boy who looks sad. "You want to make them smile," he says, and then pauses, remembering who he's talking to. "Well, I want to make them smile."

[wickedwit]

"That's it! You have it. I see a sad, cute boy, and every time, he compels me to make him smile. It feels harder-won, don't you think? Or perhaps more necessary." Claudius sighs. "And it is very pleasant to feel needed. You should make a note of that, too. There are some boys who look like they need someone to spoil and protect them, and some boys who look like they need someone to utterly dominate and ruin them ... or at least lightly tease and provoke them until they blush. If you're researching the differences in how you act around people, perhaps it depends on the boy you're with." Claudius feels like he's being really helpful here. Scientifically. "Or anyone else, I suppose."

[peaklordshen]

Shen Qingqiu ignores the or anyone else, because he doesn't understand it. Why would they be talking about anyone except boys? This is literally gay science about boys hour. "So, like, Galahad's the first kind," he says. "And—" he tries to think of who the second would be. Claudius can't mean Binghe, right?? The idea of Binghe being dominated is, is laughable. The closest he ever got is the Little Palace Mistress and her whip, but that's not dominance, it's just pain play—Binghe always turned it around in the end. He does like to tease Binghe, but—that's not–"Who, um."

[wickedwit]

"Mm," Claudius agrees profoundly, leaning some on the back of the couch to relax. He's still not going to sit on the couch like a normal person. "You like categorization. I appreciate that. Here, let's make a list. Start with the names, and then we'll decide who's which type, and whatever other types need to be established. I wonder if there's any relation to humoral temperaments. You know Luo Binghe is a choleric type, yes? Under the element of fire?" That's all so obvious he doesn't need to wait for Shen Qingqiu to answer the question. That and Claudius is already in a mood to state every thought out loud. "Laertes. Is many types, at once. And the inverse of those types. You could look at him and want him to spoil and protect you, for instance, but to treat you a little cruelly at the same time. He's going to be difficult to categorize."

[peaklordshen]

Shen Qingqiu loves categorization. Obviously he's already thought a lot about the elemental categorization of basically everyone here, for his Pokemon stuff, but Claudius is right - Laertes is difficult to categorize in elements, hence assigning him Normal/Fighting type. Plus, if you add in this extra, like, sexy factor, it gets even more complicated for everyone.

"Four isn't enough humors," he decides, sagely. "For all the ways I feel about boys."

[wickedwit]

Claudius laughs loud and long at that, setting down the vape pen to clap his hands in appreciation "Well-said. We must be rigorous. There must be some further, combinatorial categorization, yes? There's the melancholic boys like Galahad and Enjolras, but I think Enjolras has some fire in him. Mostly in regards to to the French Republic. In regards to matters of the heart, I can't tell whether he's simply inexperienced, or whether he'd prefer a softer, more tender approach. The difficulty is I know what Grantaire prefers after speaking with him ... twice? And he has some complicated history with Enjolras. Calling him a sun god for years, dying side by side with him like a Spartan, that sort of thing. But Grantaire very much enjoys it when someone's rough and commanding with him. So it's very puzzling to me -- compelled as I am by sad boys -- whether I should help Enjolras by arranging an understanding between him and this charming, masochistic young man, or whether he's still too much of an innocent for that. Do you understand?" None of this is getting written down, or particularly illustrative. Nevertheless Claudius holds up a finger. "What I mean to say is someone can combine more than one element."<sup>1

1</sup> What a long way to go for a basic Pokemon fact.

[peaklordshen]

"Which one is Grantaire?" Shen Qingqiu asks. He's not following a lot of what Claudius is saying, but he doesn't think he'd gotten that name, and he'd kind of like to be able to picture said charming, masochistic young man, apparently, which is fun, that's a fun new gay thing he'd like to be able to do, unlike when he first got here and visions of Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji engaged in yaoi sexcapades had risen like nightmares¹ behind his eyes.

He does also, however, definitely agree with the last statement. "Of course they can," he says. "And—some of them start out combining several. Like Laertes. But it sounds like—like if Enjolras is just innocent of," he gestures between them to indicate, you know, gay shit, "then he won't really manifest his other elements until put into the, the relevant situation. Like—gaining a new typing when you evolve. You gain the experience, see how you react to your partner's type, and it changes you, manifests things you didn't know about yourself." He feels like this is an incredibly profound conclusion to come to. Figuring out your kinks is exactly like Pokemon evolution.

¹...

[wickedwit]

"Shen Qingqiu," Claudius says with surprised delight. "All this time I thought your plays at vague wisdom were a put-on, but you are very wise. You must truly be a master of cultivation and gentlemanly arts." For example, with the vape pen. It feels good for Claudius to be making so many connections. Sprawling a little more on the back of the couch, he says, "Grantaire has beautiful brown curls and a wicked smile. He was covered in blood." The tone of voice says and he was perfect.

[peaklordshen]

Shen Qingqiu remembers—Grantaire had been very pretty, and very sad. They'd talked about Naruto. "Enjolras is the one he died for..." he says, more realizing it himself than telling Claudius, and then gets distracted, trailing off. He keeps getting distracted, when he looks at Claudius, and he thinks maybe it's just the gayness, because again, beautiful man, but it's something specific. The line of his body, the way he lounges across the back of the couch, it's somehow familiar. It shouldn't be a couch he's lying on, it should be—a, a rock, a beautifully animated rock, and he should be licking his paw—

"Oh my god," he says, sitting upright. "You're the hot lion."

[wickedwit]

Claudius was just picking up the vape pen again, holding it up and considering it close to his face, and the expression isn't unlike a cat lifting its paw. He blinks at Shen Qingqiu. "Which category is hot lions?" he asks.