He already feels the desire to squirm away from Shen Yuan's questions, to make a joke and let it pass and pretend he doesn't really care or didn't meant to say it in the first place -- it's a feeling akin to dread, which he could resolve by fleeing this conversation.
He frowns at his hands and wishes he had a drink, as usual. "Mine. I-- he told me something about himself. I gave him the chance to explain it, or at least tell me he regretted it, and he couldn't, not to the degree I could have accepted. Christ. I think-- no, I know I was right, but-- I wish I weren't. I miss him -- Jesu, I miss him." By the end of this speech he's flushed with embarrassment.
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momijizukamori
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Date: 2023-11-27 07:34 pm (UTC)He frowns at his hands and wishes he had a drink, as usual. "Mine. I-- he told me something about himself. I gave him the chance to explain it, or at least tell me he regretted it, and he couldn't, not to the degree I could have accepted. Christ. I think-- no, I know I was right, but-- I wish I weren't. I miss him -- Jesu, I miss him." By the end of this speech he's flushed with embarrassment.